I often hear moms talk about wanting their kids close in age, worrying that too much space between them will make the bond weaker. For me, the opposite turned out to be true.

There’s a four-and-a-half-year gap between my oldest and my second, and looking back, it was the biggest blessing. Going from zero to one child was a joy, and the transition from one to two felt manageable. But when I became a mom of three, with two little ones so close in age, it was a different kind of hard. My youngest needed so much of me that I sometimes felt I couldn’t give her sister the same one-on-one moments I had with my first.

And yet, the age gap has shown me something beautiful. My youngest often runs to her big sisters for comfort, tugging on their arms for hugs, or climbing into their laps when she’s sad. That bond is strong because they’re old enough to love her with the kind of patience and tenderness they’ve seen modeled.

The age gap gave me time. Time to savor my first child’s early years, time to grow into motherhood before juggling more, and time for my kids to form their own unique roles in our family.

What I once thought might be a challenge has turned out to be a gift.

If you’re worried about an age gap, or if you’ve been dreaming of growing your family, remember that love doesn’t live on a timeline.